these bishounen-filled days

yup, that's right. i'm being hounded by bishounens left and right. of course, i've been in anime heaven these past few days what with the cable and good anime being shown on tv, plus my collection of still unwatched anime vcds. it's good to be here at home. and right now, i'm downloading the episode guides for gensomaden saiyuki, plus images of these really, um, goodlooking, albeit, unreal guys.



i've just found the series engaging now when before, karen was already watching it. the characters are drawn in a different way here. it's just that the drawings of the characters make them look thin, like they were transparent. anyway, the travel travails of these four guys, one monk and 3 demons, make for a really good laugh some episodes and interesting stories to tell. plus, they got a killer 2nd opening theme song. and the video segment for this one is quite funny since the characters looked like they were posing for some mag, like they were pop superstars, but nevertheless, the bishounen that they are supposed to be. Ü



i'm also watching slam dunk and get backers. the latter one, however, has quite a sketchy sequence nowadays since animax, due to the christmas specials, has decided to jump some episodes. now going back, later going forward. but it's still fun.



so you see, it was really just me who got myself involved with all these bishounens. plus, i'm still gonna watch angel sanctuary. though it's bitin.



***



from a member of an ML i belong in:



To forget the thing that binds you fast,

To the vain regrets of the year that's past;

To have the strength to let go of your hold,

Of the not worth-while of the days grown old,

To dare to go forth with a purpose true,

To the unknown task of the year that's new;

To help your sister/brother along the road,

To her/his work and lift her/his load,

To add your gift to the world's good cheer,

Is to have and to give a HAPPY NEW YEAR!



***

from a survey i recently posted on friendster:





last time na umabay ka?

: umabay? ang lalim po ata ng tagalog nito..



kaninong boses gusto mo?

: lilo's voice actor, mmm...wala akong gaanong

maisip ngayon..



laman ng wallet mo?

: pera, coin purse lang e



first CD u bought?

: pirated CD ng isang pinoy rap group



gusto mong kainin ngayong panahon na ito?

: pancit palabok



magkano nauubos mong load sa isang week?

: around P50 cguro



languages na alam mo?

: filipino/tagalog, english, pangasinan



summer o rainy?

: summer!



best wish that other wished you?

: that other wished me? hmm...eto: *check ko

muna inbox ko* it's all of 18 summers ago when u

came to life that was a great bundle of joy for me

and mommy. have a nice, memorable and

wonderfuly birthday!



favrit subject dis sem?

: cw 10, fs 116



favri prof?

: sir butch



movie na nagpaiyak sayo?

: hanggang luha lang naman ako, mejo marami

din..



anong gusto mo new fon oh daming load?

: new phone!



jewelry na hindi mo tinatanggal sa ktawan mo?

: wala



pano ka magalet?

: hindi nagsasalita



fevrit movie lines?

: marami, from my fave movies. i really love that

poem in iambic pentameter from 10 things i hate

about you which i got to watch again yesterday



may friend ka bang gay?

: gay, mron..



sanay kbang magtong-its?

: ung wala lang sugal.



zodiac sign mo?

: pisces



element mo?

: i took this quiz on blogthings.com and it says

water. swak din nman ung mga descriptions.



hair color?

: black



biggest scar?

: on my left wrist



member ka ng anong video rental shop?

: video city, dagupan



ano pakiramdam ng nagseselos?

: naiinis, gustong magalit



ano pakiramdam ng in-love?

: i guess you just feel so good..ewan, di ko pa

nararanasan yan e..



nakasakay kna sa Love-Train?

: nope



tipo mong babae/lalaki?

: in terms of what? basta okay kausap..



malinaw ba mata mo?

: mabuti naman at oo



bass, baritone, tenor, alto, soprano?

: soprano?!?



mayabang kba?

: unconsciously, i guess



suplada ka ba?

: i don't think so



mapagbigay kaba?

: yes!



piercings?

: two on each ear



yosi?

: nope, pampaiksi ng buhay..besides any kind of

smoke suffocates me.

the vastness debut

here's something i read on my friendster bulletin board, probably it's most abused feature, which was posted by r.a. i think he overheard it and the question went like this:



how do i face my problem if my problem is my face?



harhar! but that was just in my head. i didn't burst out into one big, uncontrollable laugh. gensomaden saiyuki, however, could make me do just that.



***



the new year is upon us. so HAPPY NEW YEAR everyone! the bulletin board is being flooded with new year's greetings, as well as e-groups and probably later on, cellphone networks. a few more hours, roughly eight hours, and it's goodbye 2004 and hello 2005!



another year for everyone of us to take note of our past experiences and traverse another 365 days to make a difference and effect change and progress. slightly monumental but always possible. so everyone, make your mark. don't let it the year just slip by. if you had regrets the past years, try to spend each day for what it's worth.



***



a change of name. it's more descriptive for me. does the mood of this blog need to be dark? i certainly thought so when i first thought up "whirling into nothingness". i envisioned a black background but doesn't every other blogger have that nowadays? besides, i really like my blog's current color. then just awhile ago, i typed in "whirling into the vastness" as my blog's title. the width of the header didn't agree with it, especially because there was a space in between each of the letters. anyhow, i'm staying with trapped in the v a s t n e s s. the vastness being this fundamental organ of the homo sapien that is the brain, my languid existence, this habitually tiring society, this nondescript, all-encompassing world, the entire incomprehensible cosmos.

christmas and the day after

christmas day has come and gone. what happened pretty much happens every year. after breakfast with the foodstuffs we ate during our early noche buena, we went to church then went to city mall where daddy bought new clothes. karen and i were also able to buy new pants on discount. however, rj was no longer feeling well that time.



with the car's door mistakenly closed on him when we were about to leave the church, he was in a bad mood that lasted almost the whole afternoon.



when we got home, we opened the gifts under the christmas tree. rj didn't open his due to the previous incident. the rest of us, however, did open our gifts and got our pictures taken (a yearly ritual that goes back for as long as i can remember). i got some new socks and undies from santa clause. then we were also given a ping pong set. sadly however, i was no longer able to make a christmas card.



after not being able to finish laputa: castle in the sky due to a corrupted second disc (laputa is like atlantis up in the clouds with way advanced technology and treasures of its own, albeit a declining or almost non-existent populace - i wouldn't know since i didn't get to finish it), i went outside and rj was shooting some hoops. mom, dad, rj & kevin were sitting on the chairs eating and reading. then i joined him in shooting and he's already improved. eventually, the four of us were shooting already. we played 2 rounds; in the first one, karen won and in the next one, i won. it was really a delight since kevin is the best shooter among us and we thought we'd be toasted by him but unexpectedly, karen and i did well.Ü



afterwards, we played a game of two-on-two with karen and i teaming up and the two boys on their own, coming to that arrangement by way of the old-fashioned ompiang. we had a race to six points but it took us a very long time. nevertheless, it was a great exercise and we lost a good amount of sweat. we were also having great fun and it was a good way for the four of us to spend time together. we were playing until before 7. then at 7:30 pm, rj, karen and i watched finding nemo. i was able to watch this before on pirated vcd but i didn't enjoy it much then. but now, it was really funny and it's a really great animation. i love it! it's now on my favorite movies list.



after that, we proceeded to watch national treasure. they've been clamoring for it so my mom bought a pirated copy. however, when we put in the first disc, what was showing was blade iii: trinity so we just watched it since mom also bought a copy of that one along with the polar express. i, however, due to lack of sleep or whatever slept not yet midway into the first disc. so it came to pass that i haven't laid my eyes on a complete blade film yet. not the first, nor the second which mom also bought a copy, and not the third, too. something must be wrong with the film. so i slept early last night. it was 11 pm when i went to bed. and then i woke up a bit cold and early this morning.



we had a breakfast of pancit and bread. then we went to church once more. and dropped by nepo mall coz mommy said they were going to buy gizzards. and i asked them to buy some chichirya too.

christmas day

it's officially christmas day! we ate our noche buena some 30 minutes ago because my mom wanted to rest a bit earlier. i was still full from what i've eaten during afternoon snacks and dinner so i didn't eat much awhile ago. we had sisig (yum yum! this is the original one, not unlike those sold in cafeterias which no longer taste like sisig), hotdog, roll cake, puto and crema de fruta. this has been our most sparse noche buena meal. before we would have spaghetti, chicken or ham and other stuffs. today it's only like this. but we do have some macaroni salad stored in the refrigerator and tomorrow, or later this morning, mom will cook some pancit. there are also some gifts under the christmas tree but they have no names yet. santa clause will make a surprise appearance later to label our gifts, hehe.



there wasn't much noise as december 25 approached. during the previous years, there were a lot of firecrackers going off in the neighborhood. now, it seems only 1 or 2 households are setting off firecrackers and they're just few in number like around 5 since i realized that there was no noise in the neighborhood at this time.



lots of people have been texting christmas messages and greetings. the earliest one i received was at 2 am yesterday from ate issa. talk about beating the christmas rush in mobile service providers. i've already replied to each and everyone of them.



the three have already prepared christmas cards. it's been a tradition that for every significant occasion here in the house like birthdays of parents, fathers' and mothers' day and christmas day, the children just give them cards instead of gifts. it's been like that ever since. but i've run out of ideas for making cards. only karen seems to be enjoying the challenges brought about by her different visions of the card she's going to make. she's the most artistic one of us. anyway, we usually give them on christmas morning. but i don't have one yet. and if i do make one, it's just gonna be reminiscent of my christmas cards past so what am i going to do?

silence

i want silence. however at this time of day, you can't have that luxury with everyone here doing a bunch of things. you can't keep to yourself alone which is what i need so that i could write properly. i was able to write my last post on a nighttime and with the utmost silence. what about now?



karen, rj and kevin are going to watch weiss kreuz which is one that i wanted to watch too. but, i gotta get back to this and try to write with all these distractions.



mars' latest message on my tagboard kind of struck me. i wasn't really affected by it much. i've come to that thought plenty of times in the past but it's only now that somebody said those to me. but i do know that that's true and i'm aware of it because when people talk to me, we usually speak about that person's situations or other people's or various stuff but only so little about me. and it's also common that friends talk about things happening in their lives or whatever. yes, i do that. but i don't really lay it all out in the open. usually, what i talk about or those that are happening in the present, or those things that are just on the surface. i don't talk much about my dreams, my utmost concerns, my, erm, infatuations... i just think that if people want to know, they should just ask, so i never volunteer any information about me. but why is that so? i guess it's just the very nature of me.



early on in my childhood, i was never a very playful nor a noisy child. the earliest i could remember was when i was around 4. the previous years were just a blur. that's when my sister was born. i remember dad bringing mom and i to the hospital when it was near for karen's birth. then we have a baby in the house. that's also my earliest memory of my mom and dad. i've been with dad 3 months afer i was born but mommy had to get back to saudi because she's working as a nurse when she gave birth to me there so i think she came back around 1989, just enough for karen to be born on march the next year. but i do not have any recollection of the events during that part of my life so i can't really tell what kind of kid i was. but when i was 4, i know i wasn't the noisy type. i don't have many friends. i don't go out of the house and play with neighbors. i only did play with one but not much. i also had a guy cousin who came around the house when we were classmates in kinder and prep but still, it didn't make me the typical kid and after that, that cousin of mine and i haven't improved our ties. we're still cousins though we are worlds apart from each other, which kind of goes true with many other of my cousins. we're a reclusive family you might say. well, those are what the circumstances brought about. we didn't grow up with our cousins around much. so it's usually ourselves. and we didn't grow up fighting with each other. we are peaceful children. we do quarrel but there are no shouting matches and those quarrels don't last a day. i've got to say i'm really happy about that.



and then there's school. i could say i went to a pretty excellent primary school. that's where i learned to keep quiet when somebody else is talking in front which up to now i still usually do. i don't like missing out on what the teacher is saying so i really don't like making small talk to or listening to stories from classmates during classes.



i've fancied myself as an "absorber" during the years that i've realized what i do. i just listen to the story, nod in agreement or throw in a comment or two and if the recounting ends, usually i have nothing much to say, not much of my own experience to share. so it ends there. i don't dole out facts about me in turn. so what does that make me? a really quiet person. i believe if people would be asked what they knew about me, they'd say that i was a classmate or so-so and that i listened to their stories, accompanied them on whatever, but nothing really concrete about my life. perhaps they could say something about my personality but not my personal life.

growing up

growth and development hound me these past few days. since i went to study in the well-known public school near ateneo, i only get to see my siblings - a sister and two brothers all having a one-year difference with the one next to them and i a four-year difference with the oldest of them which is the girl - only during sembreaks and christmas breaks. rarely do i see them during the duration of the sem. that is if there are no holidays on mondays or whatever. besides, even if i could, i can't just go home every weekend because it will be a big burden on our pockets. so i just content myself on getting by without seeing them or my whole family, for that matter, very much. but i'm going farther from what i intended to contemplate about here.



the past year, i've seen those young ones - why karen is 14 yrs. old and in 3rd year high school, rj is a sophomore high school student and kevin is a freshman, all of them in the same high school that i graduated in - grow taller than me and as a result, i end up being teased because i'm shorter than them. hehe, i even wrote that on kevin's profile in friendster which he recently acquired. anyway, last saturday, kevin and mommy happened to stand in front of a full length mirror and it was there kevin saw that he has outgrown mommy already. and so they have, the three of them. the only one that they have yet to outgrow is daddy.



i've had my growth spurt when i was still in elementary so there's no chance of me growing anymore, at least, in lengthwise fashion. i would not want to think what would happen if i increase in size in a crosswise fashion. but those guys have a long way more to go. i wouldn't be surprised if karen would reach the model height of 5'8" (i'd like to see her be a model, too, if that happens), or that kevin would eventually be an advantage to a basketball team because of his height as well as his skills or that rj would have a muscular, toned body in place of all the fats because he no longers grows wider but taller. but more than that, changes within and without them have been taking place.



of karen, we've seen them quite a long time ago when she started menstruating. and nothing much has changed with her attitude. only now that she's a responsible person especially in school because she had a lot of positions in different school organizations and she still has to keep up with her grades and i find her working harder than i ever did back in high school, and she's still in 3rd year. i don't remember myself working ever so hard that year. however, with the two younger boys, their changes are very remarkable nowadays. it must seem so to me because i no longer see them on a daily basis but it's really interesting to see the changes taking place with them. i learned through the mail that kevin has started to wear accessories like necklaces and bracelets as well as shades. it started with just using the body spray ice gave him for his last birthday. then the boys started to acquire more clothes with kevin, our youngest, being more picky with what he wants to wear, just like me. nowadays, he wants his clothes paired, as in terno, like the shirt and the shorts/pants should have something common between them, as my mom has observed. rj doesn't have the same attitude towards clothes, but i observed that he now wears pants more often and that he's now wearing closed shoes to church, as opposed to the open sandals he used to wear.



rj now wants to play basketball usually with kevin. he also has learned to play table tennis. he also just asked me to buy a harmonica and he's making progress, says the music critic in me. he's actually quite clever in discovering how things work and how to go through different puzzles like discovering a way out to the next level in computer games - some things which i admit i'm not very gifted at - though he doesn't really get top grades in school. he also likes to play chess and he's actually gone on to beat me. he's even tried to participate in their last intramurals by playing a match to determine who would be their year level representative. he lost however, due to a mistake in the placing of his queen so he didn't get to play. he has also made a choice of musical preference and has been playing r&b, hiphop and rap tunes here in the house as opposed to my and kevin's penchant for rock music. however, he still has those silly remarks and questions of his as well as his stubborn temper - i can't quite get the exact words to tell you about it yet - which shows that he's not yet fully matured but is well on his way.



kevin has now identified rock artists that he likes though they're still based from mainstream music that reaches our city in packets, and not as a whole. he also just bought a cap, a black one which he says is his favorite color that goes with his black pants and his black rubber shoes. and i don't think he would approve anymore of a semi-kalbo haircut, more so if he knows he's gonna see his friends around. and also due to the pimples on his face, he now sports wackier or goofier or "older" expressions of disbelief on his face. i just saw a picture of his during his birthday last may and it's been a really great change. he still looked like a very innocent child there and now, some seven months later, it's as if a great many years have passed by already. he's also been trying to get me to split with him on a skateboard. he didn't use to ask me for money before but occasionally, now he does, though he isn't an extravagant spender like me. yesterday, i had agreed to an 80-20 split, to which he didn't but just awhile ago, he said he would just buy one with his own money. and yeah, he's been spending a lot more time in front of the mirror, checking his hair, if they were flat or spiky, checking his face for pimples and whatnots, and basically just admiring himself. he's also quite a capable basketball player and a diligent student. he would join karen when the exams are coming up and together, they would conquer the night and burn some midnight oils.



these are just bits and pieces of these guys just at the brink of reaching the peak of puberty. may i have the pleasure of seeing them through and finding out how wonderful people they've become. i ask you all to join me in this endeavor.



                  

                      "i am my brother's keeper"

bassist

this is now official: if i am to play the guitar in a band, i want to be the bass player. yup, those smooth sounds created under layers of distortions and high-pitched riffs really do appeal to me. i wanna learn to play the bass. i just watched bamboo in myx's orig 'to concert on tv with my bro and nathan did a good solo on one song which i think was noypi. and i think he's a good bassist. and of course, there's nu rock awards bassist of the year buddy zabala. he's been dishing out exceptional bass lines through the years he's been playing with the eheads and it's only now his talent is recognized. there's also mikey, my orgmate who's got fingers so delightful they run over the fretboard and back again and all the while providing color to the songs. then i also find this pinoy j-rock band's bassist awfully good. he played at the anime convention by up ame. the band was rotschrek - at least that's what i think the spelling was - who had a vocalist that sent females screaming their lungs out. he's really tall, slender, wears shades, and has shoulder length hair braided and tied in a pony the last time i saw him. he said their name refers to beings who are afraid of light, like vampires. unlikely enough, only the vocalist was the one who dressed like one. all the others were typical boys in worn jeans and generic shirts. their bassist probably is a member of up ame. and since they were playing rock, he had a lot of riffs going on. there were even times that he would do solos and not their lead guitarist. and due to the fast tempo, his fingers were really quick and unyielding, delivering all the necessary notes. he doesn't look awfully good but i could get a crush on him just by his playing.

gift-giving

i got a blue eyeshadow from my roommate alessa for our exchange gift ceremony in the boarding house. it included our landlady tita bel, our landlady's help ate fe and our landlady's daughter-in-law ate au as well as the four of us roommmates. an interesting thing for me since i haven't used one before, and besides, it's blue hehe. i was the one who picked ate au's name so i gave her a mug, one thing that seems to be in season for giving, after photo frames, mirrors and photo albums of christmases long past. besides, it's a safe one since she's a mother of three and i don't really know her do i know what to give to a mom.



i have one other gift to give, this time for our exchange gift ceremony in subol. i haven't thought of what to give yet since the party is still on the 23rd. however, i still don't have any ideas thinking about it now because i haven't really got a chance to get to know her. probably in the next few days, i'll come up with something.Ü



still on the subject of gifts, i got this idea from koosie because she said every other blog contains a christmas wishlist already, which i readily doubt coz' i didn't have one yet. so now i'm having one:



a list for christmas

1. my own digital camera - anybody willing to give me advice or discount?

2. a new cd-rom drive for our pc at home

3. do my assignment for chem

4. finish the lab report for chem

5. read the witching hour, interview with the vampire and agatha christie's curtain, poirot's last case

6. read the house on mango street, required for cw10

7. plenty of exercise - braces aren't very effective mind you. you could still eat although you can't do much of it right away after being adjusted but afterwards, it's still going to be swell. and now that there's lots of foodstuffs within my reach, i hate to think i'll go back to up next year heavier than when i left. i envy cara...

8. watch hellsing, serial experiments lain, laputa, fatal fury and weiss kreuz

9. watch a few good movies

10. keep up a daily blog entry - so that i'll have something to show as my journal when the new year wheels around. we're required to keep one for cw and i'm actually enjoying it but since my prof due to something hasn't been able to place mine outside of his office to which i've been coming back to for at least 3 days.

11. watch the nu rock awards on mtv on the 26th of december

12. play the guitar and piano, and learn some chops on my bro's new harmonica, the one i bought for him at jb

13. send in an entry on metroactive mag's trip for two to el nido, palawan contest

14. do some self-motivation stuff; reevalute myself; find happiness in simple things; cherish all that i have

15. oh yeah, i need to lose weight! i'm feeling fat for my height so exercise, exercise, exercise!

16. do some more bonding with classmates, friends and of course, my family

17. do some sketches - an artist on the way, yeah!

18. write

19. stop feeling like a moron every other day so that i could enjoy my two-week vacation



remember, i'm gonna pack all these stuff into the two weeks or so that i get before classes. haha! so this is all that i could think of for now. i've got lots of books here, lots of good music to accompany me during this nu107-less vacation, and my family that i miss and love. so happy gift-giving!

tragic christmas

yesterday morning, i learned that kc de venecia, the younger of the two children of joe and gina de venecia perished in a fire that resulted from their christmas lights in their home in an exclusive village in makati. i couldn't believe she was dead as soon as i heard about it. she was still young - only 16 years old - and she was the least of all people you would expect who would turn up in the news in a tragic way. i also felt a bit of sympathy as joe de venecia is our district's congressman in pangasinan. this after fpj's death earlier this week with his fans and those other people he had touched coming in droves to the sto. domingo church to pay their last respects. now fpj is another. who would have thought that he would be in a coma then shortly afterwards succumb to death? i don't know the details but i'm sure most of us who know him only as a movie actor and one of our presidential candidates during the past election wouldn't have thought that he would die this soon. two significant deaths before a bleak christmas. and before these, the tragedy that befell the residents of quezon from incessant logging. these thoughts have been contemplated by many minds before you read this i'm sure. anyway, i'm just throwing in a thought or two. it's really a tragedy before christmas.

being politically correct

i was just waiting for 12nn to arrive. i couldn't get my readings for cw 10 from blessings because there were just so many people right now so i am just going to get it tomorrow. anyway, i was looking at a visitor's blog and came upon this interesting research on political correctness. jump to: the Political Correctness Primer. you should read this. like dirty old men should be called sexually focused chronologically gifted individual. harhar! read on..

a bad feeling

arbie's statement of disillusionment yesterday has greatly affected me and it still hasn't left me today. that was around 4:30 in the afternoon. mine is caused by another thing entirely different from his, details of which i won't mention here.



i wasn't feling really up the afternoon that i went to the tambayan. i guess it rubbed off on me but i didn't feel all the way down until after our GA in up subol. words were said but they weren't meant to offend or reprimand anyone in any way. but the fact that there are many things i wanna do in life and many more things that i have to do (due to obligatoin or a promise or whatever) and i can't do all of them - i guess that's why a big, black cloud has been hanging over me. so i decided i won't go to up optics' acquaintance party anymore today and consequently, no longer pursue my planned application into the org. i also no longer want to go to mc's christmas party if ever it will push through, given the state of things.



i was feeling significantly lighter or happier last monday after our class in philo. we watched Miracle on 34th Street, a feel-good Christmas movie. i was quite happy that christmas is here already. then arbie's statement. i actually read a blog entry of his mondy night and i think that's what started it coz' i wasn't really feeling good come tuesday.



well, the things that life offers you. i wanna get rid of this. i got to talk to someone later.

isang linggong pagkawala

kahapon, nakapanood ako ng film sa up cine adarna, mississippi masala ung title, na kasama si denzel washington. hindi naman gaanong nakakaapekto so wala na akong ibang sasabihin dito..



pagkatapos nun, nagpunta ako ng sm north. pakay ko talaga ay bumili ng pinakabagong album ng radioactive sago project na urban gulaman. nagawa ko naman iyon, at pag-alis ko ng tower, may bitbit na rin akong kind of blue ni miles davis. napakinggan ko na silang pareho at ang galing talaga. iyon nga lang, ang aking urban gulaman ay may kaunting sira. hindi natatapos patugtugin ang track 8 at ang track 9 naman ay hindi napapatugtog.



tapos mula kagabi hanggang kaninang mga alas-tres, binasa ko ang isang nobela ni jude deveraux na ang pamagat ay the summerhouse. unang beses ko pa lang nakabasa ng nobela niya dahil pag mga romansa, madalas pare-pareho na ang mga kwento. at ganun din naman sa kanya. iyon nga lang, iyong sa kanya ay medyo merong may twist. nakabalik kasi sa kasaysayan (di ako makaisip ng mas mabuting salita kaysa dito sa ngayon e) ng tatlong linggo at pagkatapos nun, pwede nilang mabago ang buhay nila kung tatanggapin nila ang mga pagbabago. tatlong babaeng magkuwa-kuwarenta pala ang mga pangunahing tauhan dun. hindi rin pala ako ang may-ari ng librong iyon. iyon ay sa roommate kong si mars, na kasalukuyang nasa laguna ngayon. kaya walang nangyari sa buong araw ko. hanggang alas tres ako nakaupo lang sa kama at nakikinig sa sari-saring musika. tapos mga alas-sais lang ako lumabas ng bahay para mag-net dahil isang linggo na rin akong hindi nakapasok sa mga computer centers dito sa up.



may isang linggo pa akong mamalagi dito sa up diliman bago ako bumalik sa aking probinsya para sa taunang pagdiriwang ng pasko. ngunit hanggang sa ngayon, hindi ko pa rin nadarama ang nakasanayan nang taguriang "christmas spirit". bakit kaya? tumatanda na ba ako?



kakaunti na rin ang load ng cellphone ko. hindi ito aabot hanggang sa ika-31 ng disyembre kung magtetext lang ako nang magtetext kaya hanggang ngayon, hindi pa rin ako nakakapag-forward ng mga quotes. puro mga importanteng bagay lang ang tinutugunan ko.



nung biyernes pala, nakapag-inuman ko kasama ng mga orgmates ko sa MC. ang saya. noon lang ako nakapunta sa Oye's na malapit lang dun sa pinagdausan ng FR ng batch namin. naka-isa't kalahating beer ako kasi hindi ko na kaya. hindi ko naman talaga gusto ang lasa ng beer. pero masaya dahil ang lahat ay masaya. may tumutugtog at nagkakaroon ng choral singing. hanep nga dahil tatlong beses namin kinanta ang katang hello digital world ng makopa. astig!



para sa linggong ito, hanggang dito na lang muna. may klase pa ako bukas at medyo malalim na ang gabi.

poring!

i'm hungry.. i haven't had breakfast yet. cutting back on food expenses, i guess. i'm gonna meet my aunt and cousin later for lunch at sm north so..that's where i'll have my fill hehe..



as to the title of this post, i was just so amused by this sound that is made by a character of the same name in ragnarok: the animation. level up sponsored a ragnarok dubbing contest yesterday at una kame and the dubbers, they were good.



well, till next time.

huh?!?

watching my little bride last night has got me wondering about the status of my own pathetic love life.. there's not one to begin with in the first place. *currently wishing that my cute chinito prince charming will sweep me off my feet later*



yeba! i'm off!

after the storm

it's a very sunny saturday morning. i haven't done anything yet except (ha!) go to the bathroom. i haven't eaten yet. i just got up from bed and i wanted to write.



since alessa didn't go home for the weekend because she and her brother had a fight and they haven't made up yet, we decided to go out yesterday. we went to sm north. since it was still early for the movie we wanted to watch, we had lunch first at tokyo tokyo. i really liked the pork tonkatsu the first time i ate it with her at sm centerpoint. and since it was soft enough for my teeth to be able to bite them without much constraints, so that's what we ordered. i also love their red ice tea. then, well, we watched pa-siyam. since it was the only one that interested us from the movies that were showing there.





pa-siyam didn't strike me much as the horror type. sure, there was a ghost and mysterious happenings in the house but the lingering emotion i felt quite afterwards (since it didn't really last that long; as soon as i went to the bathroom for a much needed fix, the movie left my mind already. except for that time that i was actually peeing and my thoughts flew to the woman being abused and a tear escaped from my eye and then when i got out, that was it.) was pity. to sum it up, it was quite a waste of time. i wish we could have watched some other movie. at least it wasn't priced that high, unlike when feng shui was shown.



then we went to papemelroti to buy a replacement for my journal in cw10 since the original one has leaves that were the same with the recyclable paper material that papemelroti is using. i also found a new design of their 2005 planners that was colored blue. but i already bought one already. i wish i had that blue one for myself. i also found a "my sketchbook for everyday things." since it was quite cheap, i just bought it, without any idea of where i'm gonna use it. well, yesterday, i started on the first page already, doddling random things. by the way, i looked up papemelroti's website yesterday, quite curious about this little shop and all. the name was actually from a fusion of the names of the 5 children of the couple who started the business. well, right now, the kids are doing the business on their own and even branching out to a number of other enterprises.



after that, we did some groceries then we went home already. i was able to watch getbackers (yihee!) and slam dunk. however, the last two days that i've been watching, the series seems to have gone into the mundane stuff as fillers. yesterday was quite funny. the one awhile ago was outright um, stupid. i couldn't imagine a serious character as shido fighting it out neck and neck with ban mido, as in the thursday episode, and well, yesterday was his episode and i did not like it at all.



i did a bit of netsurfing afterwards, deleting a lot of the mail i got from my groups and i ordered a beerkada shirt from mr l.



then i watched the korean movie my little bride - on silent mode, mind you - on ate jonnah's computer. it was a really cute movie. cute characters, cute events though i didn't really like the ending. a 15-year-old high school girl is forced to marry a childhood friend who's now graduating from college to fulfill her grandfather's wishes. of course, both of them didn't approve of the arrangement but they couldn't do anything. so right after the wedding, they moved into the same house but they didn't have sex yet. at least, until after she's graduated from college, according to the girls' mom. the guy was just so cute and so kind. he's a playboy type but with his wife, he's really adorable the way he looked after her. it was just romantic and they really looked good together. hehe.. cheesiness going over me.. but i did enjoy it. i even played the two cds again, the second one before the first.



oh well, today, i'm planning to go the up ame event at bahay ng alumni. i still haven't found anyone who will go with me. anyhow, i'm going because it's going to be the first anime event that i'll be attending and there'll be a cosplay and that's where mr. l will be to sell his beerkada shirts.



so well, that's all for this morning. ciao!

bastusan na

i've been hearing kjwan's daliri for quite some time already and it usually stays on my mind for quite a long while after hearing it. i dunno if these are the true lyrics but these are the only ones available on the net so:



Marami ang nagsabi

Daliri mo'y may labi

Kung minsan sinasabi

Ang hawak mo ay sungkit

Ang init ng 'yong kapit

Tuluy-tuloy ang higpit

Nawawala ang alaala

Nawawala ang sakit



'di mo na maalala

Kung saan ka pupunta

'di mo na makilala ang iyong…



Kung minsan may nagsabi

Ang puso mo ay itim

Halik ng buwan sa hangin

Sabik sa mga salarain

Saan ka hahanapin?

Kailan ako titikim?

Nawawala ang alaala

Nawawala ang sakit



- Kjwan

what does your name stand for?

i got this one from jen:



What does your name stand for? Spell your name and copy what each letter signifies about your personality.



++++++++++++++



M - Success comes easily to you.

A - You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.

R - You are a social butterfly.

I - You are always smiling & making others smile.

A - You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.



R - You are a social butterfly.

O - You are very open-minded.

M - Success comes easily to you.

I - You are always smiling & making others smile.

N - You like to work, but you always want a break

A - You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.



C - You definitely have a partier side in you,dont be shy to show it.

A - You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.

C - You definitely have a partier side in you,dont be shy to show it.

H - You are not judgemental.

O - You are very open-minded.



M - Success comes easily to you.

I - You are always smiling & making others smile.

S - You are very broad-minded.

L - Love is something you deeply believe in.

A - You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.

N - You like to work, but you always want a break

G - You have excellent ways of viewing people.



YOUR TURN:

A - You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.

B - You are always cautious when it comes to meeting new people.

C - You definitely have a partier side in you,dont be shy to show it.

D - You have trouble trusting people.

E - You are a very exciting person.

F - Everyone loves you.

G - You have excellent ways of viewing people.

H - You are not judgemental.

I - You are always smiling & making others smile.

J - Jealousy.

K - You like to try new things.

L - Love is something you deeply believe in.

M - Success comes easily to you.

N - You like to work, but you always want a break

O - You are very open-minded.

P - You are very friendly and understanding.

Q - You are a hypocrite.

R - You are a social butterfly.

S - You are very broad-minded.

T - You have an attitude, a big one.

U - You feel like you have to equal up to people's standards.

V - You have a very good physical and looks.

W - You like your privacy .

X - You never let people tell you what to do.

Y - You cause a lot of trouble.

Z - You're always fighting with someone.

strange dream

i just got up from bed though i've been awake since 6. and that's considering i slept at around 12 am already. i woke up from a strange dream. the way towards CS has been changed. it's more high tech. however, its speed is like a conveyor belt. and i don't recognize the building anymore. there was a guy going into the building who was carrying a really huge package which looked like a tall stereo.and there were times when you had to jump while it was transporting you so that it would be faster. and when you jump, it's like a long jump and you do a somersault in midair and you land on your back and you stay lying down. really weird. i found out about that because i forgot a type of brush that was with me which we were supposed to use for our fs 116 class. and surprisingly, the brush was the special brush i got for my braces. and i thought it would take so long ebecause i left it at the boarding house but when i got back, the turn of events seem to imply that only seconds have passed. i also dreamed that my mom was into microbiology and that some time ago, someone texted me that tita edith was sick. and then eventually, that she was well into dying which i forgot to tell my mom. when the last text came,, that's when i saw my mom with tita cyn, her sister who's a real life doctor. and i gleaned from the situation that my mom's gonna try to do something to save her, knowing that only microbiology could provide the necessary tools to do that.



well, that's that. yoyong is on her way out to the south china sea. no classes today. till later.

random musings on a rainy thursday evening

yoyong

another class-less thursday for students and another bane to UP students' MTh classes. more so for me because i was supposed to have a class in my major today and two ge subjects and we've been missing lots of classes already we might not be able to tackle everything.



all around us, the super typhoon Yoyong is still making its presence felt. back in dagupan, everyone's fine. there were just winds but no rains. it's good because then, they won't have to evacuate yet. right now, there are bits of rain and some wind. however, bulacan and quezon province as well as catanduanes are very hard hit areas. i heard that some 1,000 people died already. this is the most disastrous disaster i've encountered yet during my "conscious" living years. i hope no more terrible damage will be done. i know not many can begin to imagine what those families who have lost homes or loved ones feel right now. i'm sure they know the term or the word for it but the wrods do not contain the emotion - be it horror or sorrow - for what is really happening. i read this idea in anita shreve's sea glass which i just finished some minutes earlier, after eating a footlong sandwich and mango juice for dinner which satisfied my stomach but left my braces a little hurting.



in the boarding haus all day

all four of us were only here in the room most of the day. mars and i haven't stepped a foot out of the house yet. it's either we do some school stuff, read novels, write, watch the news or lie down and sleep. i've also been soundtripping earlier in the day, going through my cds, and now, i want to hear something new so i'm quite craving for radioactive sago project's new album, urban gulaman which by the way, is available at sarabia optical at the shopping center for Php 250.00. i also found sound's first album, bossa manila, a fitting theme to the day's mood when it wasn't raining yet but it wants to already with the clouds dark above everyone and everybody's just inside the houses not doing much. so what am i gonna do tomorrow when there's no classes again? i'm gonna make a headstart on one of the two agatha chirstie novels i bought recently. it's gonna be a long weekend... seriously though, i think classes should have been held today. it was such a waste since there were no strong rains or winds during the earlier part of the day.



nu rock awards

i just remembered. the NU rock awards are suposed to be held tonight. i wonder what's happening right now, if there's anything that's happening at all.



couldn't sleep

i've actually tried daydreaming this morning. i wanted to sleep but i couldn't so i imagined my mr. right has come along approaching me after class one day. haha..like that would happen in the near future.



books

i borrowed two books from the library yesterday (yeba!). i actually found john grisham's pelican brief, the client and the chamber but i didn't borrow any one of those coz' even when you think you've read most of the novel already, you'll find you're not even halfway through but it's just so engaging you won't put it down and i don't need that kind of distraction right now. instead, i borrowed anne rice's the feast of all saints, her only novel that i found inspite of the long list that was displayed on the opac. while i was moving through the shelves, i stumbled upon the creative writing section and i borrowed a book from it. i didn't find my favorite of old, the one entitled "what if?". hopefully, it's just on loan and not yet lost forever. maybe because of the long weekend, i could borrow tolkien's the fellowship of the ring. i've been meaning to read it since last year but i haven't gotten around to finishing half of it yet.



realizations on writing

while i was trying to read the creative writing book i borrowed from the lib, i realized once again that for me to improve, i should just write and write like what i'm doing right now. it's the easiest way to go. and then i should open my mind and read a lot so that i'll have ideas from different areas or aspects of life. yeah, that's gotta be it. the books try to get you to come up with ideas for writing but if you know what you want to write, that's madly fine and you're better off.



conversations

i haven't had much chance for conversation today, not even with the four of us complete in the room almost the whole day.



it's in some conversations with the pople closest to me and who are actually critical thinkers that i actually learn some things about stuffs even about things 'bout myself. at the back of my mind i knew but only recently did i realize it for what it really iwas when alessa and i were talking and i said it out in the open. only then did i fully realize that i was actually like that. i don't have a lot of guy friends. the real guy friends i have i could count on only one hand. i do know a lot of guys who can carry a conversation with me, even in high school. there are times when we're together and there's a little bonding moment but after that day, i feel like nothing's changed between us and i should treat him like how i treated him before we bonded and that amounts to not simply noticing him. weird thing for me. i evny people who have close guy friends, even guy best friends but whenever i come close to having even a guy friend, i shy away and so the realtionship goes back to square one.



ness's debut

i quite envy ness. she held her debut celebration last sunday but her birthday is actually on monday. it was held at padi's point. from the party alone, you can tell that she has touched a lot of lives and so many people consider her close to their heart. most of her guests are our high school batchmates. i quite envy her because of the relationships she has forged. i wish i was also quite like her. and she's got a tight-knit, emotional family, the last adjective being voiced out by her mom herself in a letter which was read during the party. she just lost her dad and everyone's still grieving over that. her sisters even cried after their song and message for her.



the food could have been good enough if i could bit but i could only swallow. i did get to eat embotido, chicken, lechon and fruit salad. quite yummy, esp. the lechon and i loved the salad.



i could say that ness knows a lot of pretty good singers since during her 18 songs, almost everyone delivered remarkable performances. the first one who sang was carissa and she sang tattooed on my mind. and hwenever i'll hear that song, i know i'm going to remember that keyboardist from padi's because that's the first song that they played and right there and then you could see that he's really good, not to mention the fact that he was in red, good-looking and seemed like a really nice guy. anyway, i don't think i'll see him again so he'll just remain a memory.



tomorrow

i wanna watch carnivale tomorrow. i hope i could. gma has already announced that there'll be no classes tomorrow. but i can't go home again. it would be dangerous plus i have an early class on monday. well hopefully, we'll already have classes then.



i wanna look for the lyrics of light and shade by fra lippo lippi. i was listening to the song this morning and the lyrics were kinda interesting.



tomorrow, i'm hoping to get out of the house and go to a computer center. i'll post on my blog and ready my mail. i haven't replied to eduardo yet on friendster. and i ought to practice the keyboard or the guitar, then study some, read novels and not eat a lot. i wanna watch a movie. hehe.. tomorrow then Ü